Archive for September, 2012

I'm pretty sure that with the near simultaneous discoveries of the Higgs Boson "God" particle and the precipitous descent into ever more dramatic criminality and psychopathic behavior represented by the LIBOR scandal that we as a race of beings have reached the ipsissimus of polarized consciousness. Can these two realities co-exist without suggesting the unthinkable, like that all these weensy little bosons are running around bringing form to energy without giving a rats ass about the consequences, like an army of mental cases packin' boners for anything that moves and spreading their tainted seed far and wee. If these random intersects, gaseous outpourings and occasional "meaningful" manifestations are the best that Mr. Higgs' boson has to offer, then perhaps the financial scam-masters of the world really ARE, as Lloyd Blankfein suggests, doing Gods work. Oh my.......... On the other hand it probably was a bit presumptuous of the physics community to expect a boson to live up to a nickname like "the God particle". A little like calling your kid Leonardo von Einstein (your last name here). So now that it's been found, what? Whats all the hubbub? Turns out nobodies real sure on that. Physicists that I've seen interviewed glaze over a bit at the question and then respond with  some form of "we'll have to see what the practical applications are as the data gets a thorough going over." Maybe we can make water boil faster by adding a nano cup of bosons. If you ask me, their makin' it up as they go along. High Priests (esses) of hyperbole with their arcane language and uber nerdy ways. They drink deeply the spice and worm their way through time into the infinitude of invisible colliding particles. This serene and timeless space where the photons and quarks and yes, now the Higgs' are endlessly at play. Modern day mystics, bringing forth their imaginings, finding them, naming them, making them pets. Was the particle discovered, or did they invent it? Are we at the helm or just navigating through chaos attempting to puzzle things out? We've had our share of photon showers of late. It's been a squinty summer with occasional relaxed iris'. It's a weather pattern that I like because hot and dry suits my withering constitution and given enough water, the farm thrives on the suns radiance. The strong winds I could do without but no matter how often I raise my arms and scream toward the heavens, the gusty response comes back sounding like a huge crowd of people laughing their asses off. I named my new puppy Dementia, so I wouldn't forget. She's already caught two deer, a pig and a small child from up on Easy street. She's part pit bull, part jaguar, part boa constrictor and part corn starch . I was approached at the farmers market not long ago, by an odd sort of fellow wearing an eye patch and a sullen look. He had a razor thin scar running from the corner of his right eye to the corner of his nostril. His pallor was sickly and his scent stale. He introduced himself as Otto Schtuprmensch and said he was an assistant v.p. at Monsanto's most secretive genetics research facility located a mile down in the heart of Mauna Kea. He said they were toying with various combinations of inter species modifications ("mods", he called them). He said that they were working with the DLNR to create a super predator to eradicate the deer. "How did you come to find me", I asked. "I vus chust henging out at ze schtoppvatch ze uzzer night, unt zom vun told me zet I should call you because you heff prrroblems wiss ze deer", he said. "Yes, yes I do", I replied. "Vood you like to try vun of our latest four mod creajons," he asked. "Well I'm not sure", I replied. "Vuts not to be shoor', he belched. "Well, its the whole trans genetic thing and the messing with nature deal", I said. "Vhat, you neffer ate a corndog", he oozed. He then proceeded to pull the cutest little creature you've ever seen out of his overcoat pocket. Looked just like a pit bull puppy but with the sleekness and spots of a Jaguar and a tail with eyes and a mouth at the end. He put her down on the floor and she stood there trembly still, scanning the room. Then she leapt toward the kitchen, opened a cupboard door and snagged three cockroaches quick as a wink. Two with the mouth, one with the tail. She popped the tail roach into her proper mouth as she ambled back over to us and chewed with a certain visible delight on her face. Smiley like. He said she would get to about 70 pounds and that the tail would grow up to 15 feet, have the strength of a constrictor and the capacity to consume a small deer. Apparently mouth and tail share the same digestive mechanism which has been modified to render small piles of thoroughly composted poo out a belly portal. I said, "why the corn starch?" " To make zem biodegrrrradable", he replied. " I'll take her". Never thought I'd have another dog like creature. Now if I can just figure out what to name her. We're at the end of the first half of the mango season at the Rancho. Been a heck of a year for fruitset. All the old timers are goin' on about it. Had our first Hadens coming in July. Still some hanging. Those were followed up by the r2e2's or Golden Globes which are about half harvested. The Rapozas (Ooooooooommmyum) are a third done with the biggest and most mind numbingly tasty globules still plumping up. Of the four qualities upon which mango's are assessed i.e., fiber less, juicy, sweet and melting, the Rapoza rules. We've had a smattering of Glenns and Popes and I just noticed a half dozen White Piries out on the tree by the Leghorn paddock. Had my first Golden Glow the other day. It was off a small healthy specimen out in the youngest orchard. It was the only fruit on the tree and had reached the point where the merest touch dropped it into my hand. Perfect. We're lookin' at gobs of Keitt's starting in a couple of weeks and going for weeks. Same with the Zillate's and the Brooks. I'm looking forward to the first ever fruit off a small Florigon tree planted just last year. The mango will hang for six months or more before tree ripening. It is a compelling sight, a wonder to watch from flower to food and a heckuva way to mark time. It's a quarter till ripe and about half past harvested. Keeping time is the obsession that enslaves. Marking time reveals natures resilience and abundance. Not much has changed at the Rancho since my last post. After twenty five years there's something of a settled feel to the older orchards and the only thing that really changes is the density. The way the trees gradually fill in the space between and have the potential to give ten or fifteen percent more fruit each year, which means increasing abundance for many years to come. We'd like to get to the point where we can create a fall/winter mango market bubble and hold the public hostage. We figure prices would top off around the holidays and peak at about 43 bucks a pound by Chanukah. Along with our plan to farm organically grown Ahi in our newly renovated salt water pond and sell when it tops out during the holidays at about 60 bucks a pound, our work year should last about two and a half months, pay the years expenses, top off our I.R.A's and put that new Maserati suv in the garage. I have seen the promised land, and it is my backyard. Permallulia. The more you show, the more we'll grow. Peace